The “airmail gaze” invokes the sexual politics of the gaze and suggests a sexualised way of looking that empowers AvGeeks and objectifies aeroplanes. In the airmail gaze, the aircraft is visually positioned as an “object” of aerosexual desire. Within this outlook, aircraft types may be reduced to being ranked on desirability alone with no appreciation of their flying qualities or historical importance. To understand the airmail gaze we must first embrace it. So let’s judge aircraft manufacturers through the utterly disgraceful metric of which produced the highest percentage of beautiful aircraft types.

Before we start this reckless meander into beauty fascism let us check how fit the men behind Hawker were. Like most great Britons, Hawker co-founder Harry Hawker wasn’t British – he was Australian – and he sure was ‘beach-ready’. Intense eyes and an athletic build score our Harry a respectable 6.8/10.

The pioneering pilot, racing car driver, motorboat champion and all-around housewives’ favourite, Sir Thomas Sopwith was one hot tamale. There could only be one actor that could play him, Scottish hunk James Mcavoy. All the single ladies and all the single-engined ladies (as Hawker specialised in single-engined aircraft) flocked to form a heteronormative Sopwith Bee-line to meet him. A dainty poetic look scores Thomas an utterly desirable 7/10.

And now we go to the aircraft rankings. We put together a team of the world’s most degenerate aircraft historians, deprived them of sleep and served them bottomless expresso martinis as they made the following controversial decisions. Above 50 is attractive, below unattractive – and 50 is deemed OK. As Hawker had 41 types they did not invoke a penalty for a small number of total types. If you disagree with any of these rankings please support us on Patreon, order The Hush-Kit Book of Warplanes or donate on PayPal (button on the top of this page) before adding your own half-baked opinion in the comments section below.

Most Beautiful

With an impressive beauty score of 90, the P.V.3 fighter prototype of 1934 was Hawker’s most gorgeous aeroplane, and one of the most beautiful ever built. Note the elegant spatted undercarriage, perfectly balanced form, noble nose and polished metal. This dream machine oozed sex, love and any other kind of appeal you can think of.

Most ugly

Hawker Duiker

The Duiker (rhymes with biker) was Hawker Engineering’s first in-house attempt at an aeroplane and was named for the African duiker antelope. The meat of the duiker contributed to the spread of Ebola, and several types of duiker are on the endangered list- and its aircraft namesake was similarly unfortunate. Directionally unstable at all speeds, slow and dangerously heavy with inappropriately thin wheels and tyres, the aircraft skulked in shame behind an awkward parasol wing. Its high slab fuselage sides were also utterly inelegant.

Average

To modern eyes, the Hurricane may look rather wonderful, but it is neither the sleekiest – nor the meanest-looking World War II fighter. It looks OK. So now to the scoreboard!

Hawker Aircraft Types Ranked by Beauty

Aircraft type	Beauty score out of 100
41. Hawker Duiker 1923 prototype	23
40. Hawker Hornbill 1925	24
39. Hawker Danecock 1925	24
38. Hawker Hotspur 1938	25
37. Hawker P.1127 1960 prototype	43
36. Hawker Woodcock 1923	47
35. Hawker Hedgehog 1924 prototype	48
34. Hawker Hurricane 1935	50
33. Hawker Sea Hurricane	50
32. Hawker Harrier 1927 prototype	53
31. Hawker Nimrod 1930	58
30. Hawker Cygnet 1924	61
29. Hawker Henley 1937	61
28. Hawker Tornado 1939	65
27. Hawker Hoopoe 1928	70
26. Hawker Typhoon 1940	70
25. Hawker Audax 1931	71
24. Hawker Hartbeest 1935	71
23. Hawker Tempest 1942	72
22. Hawker F.20/27 1928 prototype	73
21 Hawker Hart 1934	74
20. Hawker Hind 1934	74
19. Hawker F.2/43 Fury 1943 prototype	75
18. Hawker Sea Fury 1944	75
17. Hawker Hornet 1929	77
16. Hawker Hawfinch 1927	78
15. Hawker Tomtit 1928	78
14. Hawker Hector 1936	78
13. Hawker Hart 1928	80
12. Hawker P.1081 1950 prototype	81
11. Hawker Osprey 1929	82
10. Hawker Demon 1933	82
9. Hawker Dantorp 1932	84
8. Hawker Sea Hawk 1947	85
7. Hawker Hunter 1951	85
6. Hawker Horsley 1925	86
5. Hawker P.1052 1948 prototype	87
4. Hawker P.1072 1950 prototype	88
3. Hawker Fury 1931	89
2. Hawker P.1040 1947 prototype	89
1. Hawker P.V.3 1934 prototype	90

AVERAGE 67%